Peace on Earth Begins Within

Last nights meditation with the Vessels of Peace (to hold the space for peace as Doulas) set the tone for the rest of my evening. I find that the deeper I move into this commitment with this group of strangers the deeper I am moved into the places I must personally explore to find peace.

For example in rewriting a chapter in Picking up Moonbeams about an event that occured when I was six, I discovered anger. This discovery was made with the help of a friend who, after I shared a copy of the chapter, shared her feeling that there was unresolved emotional baggage lurking there. I had left evidence of my anger lying out in plain view, when I described the scene at the funeral. I was enraged with my friend Helena for dying. That anger has colored my relationships with feminine energy, including my own, ever since.

Between the abusive grandmother, mother and a girlfriend who died when I was so young, I set up the perfect incarnation scenario to insure that I would be disenfranchised from my own femaleness. Since this discovery I have spent time meditating on the ways that this disrespect has shown up in my life and I found a lollapalooza last night.

I read a piece by Michael Brown
http://www.merliannews.com/Wellbeing_amp_Healing_40/Here_Comes_The_Sun_printer.shtml
about how we’re affected by Solar activity. On first read it was thought provoking when I happened across the piece again I decided to reread it. As I was perusing his description of how solar flares affect us I realized it was like reading a description of menopause. In fact I have read much new age material that could be describing menopausal symptoms complete with hot flashes. Of late I have stopped drinking coffee in an effort to stop the dozen or so episodes of night sweats that I have been experiencing nightly for years.

Michael Browns advice to us when we are being bombarded by the effects of the solar hot flashes was to stop resisting the energy and ask the energy what it had to teach. This is similar to the advice of Lynn Andrews of the Sisterhood of the Shield about giving one self up to the flash/energy because resistance makes it worse. I got into bed with these thoughts and so remembered to bless the next hot flash and asked for the lesson. That lesson took a few seconds to download and would take hours to explain in detail, it was a lesson about having issue with authority.

Menopause is an authority and I have been resisting that authority rather than respecting and acquiescing. This truth rang so true, so sweet and clear it was easy to bless the energy and release the anger that has been subverting. Throughout the night as the heat came up I welcomed the energy, asked for the lesson if any, affirmed and loved my body, and blessed and loved the experience of menopause itself. By morning the hot flashes were more than cut in half. As I wrote that sentence the heat came up; welcoming it resolves or releases without flashing into a sweat.

This brings me a new peace with my body and the lessons it has to teach. I am happy and grateful to have created a new peace for myself while creating an intentional space as a Doulas of Peace for a peace that we can all share.